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I thought that I would do something good for humanity to not procreate and add to the depletion of the Earth. I felt that I was morally superior to all those women who wanted, and had, their two point six children. The fact that I, honestly, did not look my age facilitated me in this delusion. The fact that I have had no illnesses beyond the occasional cold led me to believe that I had time and good genes on my side. Well, guess what, I was wrong about all of those things. I decided one day, about two years ago, to eschew the Nazarite vow that I made as a child (fodder for another essay I suppose) and have a child myself. I have written about broken vows in this forum already so I won’t linger on this, but suffice to say that things have not gone as planned. My IVF failed. In truth, I FAILED. I was the one who had no eggs in my two follicles — six short of what the doctor wanted, but at least two gave me the chance of twins. It was a nasty shock. I had to face facts for the first. Got nowhere, but our inquiries to the one in Ottawa at least got a polite response. I was sort of told that it would be easier to get permission for just one of us to go, and I'm wondering if we ought to pursue that route." One of us would be more than we've got now," Bud said. "The heck of it is, if it's just one person, who do we send? Gil, it just about comes down to you." Yeah," Gil said. "I know that. If we could even get permission for three, I think I'd be a lot more comfortable, but there's going to be a limit to what I could do by myself. I figure with three, I go, I've been in the area, got a good idea of what I'm looking for. Steve goes, so we're not dependent on interpreters. Rod goes, because I'm about ninety-nine point nine percent sure that it's going to involve excavating a dig, if we get that far." All I can say is try for one, try for three, try for all of us," Bud said. "Take what we can get." It gets damn frustrating," Gil said. "But, we've been around that block.
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